How far would you go?

I attended a civil wedding recently and being a "tsismosa" that I am, I bluntly ask the cost of their wedding. I just wanted to get an idea about the costs, that's all. And frankly, I wasn't expecting that they would be spending that much $$$$$ since they don't have much savings (I personally know the guy) and both have "unstable" employments. Currently, the guy is making good money, the girl is a babysitter (her chosen career even though she had a degree).

Planning for our wedding, my hubby and I had to rely on how much we have and how much our family is willing to shoulder/contribute... I remember cutting my guests list three times! Choosing a more practical wedding ring (gold bond) instead of the ones with 5 stones to signify "till death to us part." I would never go to the extend of borrowing money for my "dream wedding." I'm a very practical and realistic person. It's just not worth being in debt for a one-day event in my life! Still, even with budget contraints, I had a wonderful wedding! And I wouldn't change a thing.

Would you? Would you borrow money to cover your wedding expenses? Would you used up your credit cards even though you know that interest rates are at 28%? Is it wise to start your married life with debts? Well, that's what these newlyweds did. They are actually the second couples that I know of who had to borrow money for their wedding.

I know that its a once in a lifetime event! But lets get real. Live within your means. You don't have to invite all the people that you've met (considering that they only have a handful of friends and no relatives when they first migrated 3 years ago)... you don't have to invite those you meet once or twice a year on social gatherings... you don't have to invite the relatives of your friends... or friends of your friends... And you can't expect to make money by telling poeple that you prefer "cash gifts" or even with "money dance." I can't help but wonder that the only reason they did the money dance was to get more money from their guests rather than as part of a tradition.

Proud. That's what these couples are! They want things to be grand even if they can't afford it. They live in a dream world. They're not thinking/planning ahead. To each his own... I just wish them both the best of luck!


Ka Uro said...

I'm with you on this one. I dont' understand why some people will spend all their savings and even borrow for more just for one occassion. It would have been better if they invested the money for their future.

But I guess some people are different. A grand wedding is part of their dream, so they want to live it, whatever the cost. Best wishes na lang sa mga ikakasal.

Junnie said...

i sold my car for our wedding...well it was up to be sold din naman...but we spent just enough for the wedding, without borrowing...we made do with what we have....we cant say, we lived within our means, kundi we wouldnt have had a wedding that we can remember....relatives and friends pitched in....softdrinks were free from Pepsi (where I used to work), the Room 1430 (note 143) was discounted by Nestle's supplier, and I did my own hair....hahahah

Kevin Lam said...

We have a saying in chinese "the same kind of rice feeds a thousand kinds of man", this means it is impossible to comprehend everyone in this world, some people does things which we can relate to, but some are not and even beyond our comprehension, But does that mean it was right or wrong?

Everyone in this world has their own priorities in life. Maybe your friend's priority is a grand wedding!

But then again, Too little of something is not good, but too much of something will be bad also, so, balance is very important.
Anyway, Congratulation na rin sa newly wed!!!

notsquare said...

No, i wouldnt overspend, or borrow for my wedding. the more intimate and the simpler the better.

but i would spend for a Discovery Weekend etc. Its the marriage that counts, not really the wedding day... hay. some people...

denden said...

i agree with you jo. i think that it's the marriage that counts and not the wedding but having said that i still want to have a wedding that i can remember, after all i intend to only do it once. but that doesn't mean that you have to spend sooo much to have a great wedding.

i've always envisioned my wedding to be simple, solemn and attended by people we love, who have been there for us, someone we both want to be there to witness us start a new life.

hahahahahaha @ Junnie's comment.

JO said...

Ka Uro, to each his own talaga.

Junnie, at least you have a car to sell. that's a different story.

Lam and Bea, you said it right!

Denden, I have limited budget on my wedding, yet its still a wedding I wouldn't forget. What matters is how you look at it and how you prioritize.

goyong said...

Pag ikinasal
Be praktikal
Wag gawing SAKAL (stranggle)
Ang yong KASAL (marriage)
Huwag pakagastos (expenses)
Para sa dating na musmos (babies)

evi said...

we made plans for our wedding almost a year because I didn't want to consume my entire wage just for it moreso to loan altho' i know it can only happen once. that's for myself. not sure about others... maybe it can happen twice or even more than that. hihi... so, we gave ourselves time to save and spend little by little so you wouldn't feel the pressure of spending too much. it worked for us. we splurged but we did it slowly. and we still managed to enjoy singlehood during the preparations. as a matter of fact, the priest didn't want us to take the seminar because t'was too early and he thought that it is possible that things can happen in between. but he allowed us anyway.

JO said...

Its ok to spend naman as long as you can afford it... not because you were pressured to do it or want to show off.

Raquel said...

Hi Jo, I read some of your entry pero isa pa lang ang nakita kung tama...grabe, andami ko na ring alam sayo.

I read about your college days too pero di naman nakalagay dun kung puro kayo babae...

Tsaka mo pa lang alam ang gisi nung nag-asawa ka na, hehehe.