Saying "I'm Sorry"

"Sticks and stones can break your bones,
but words can truly make or break you."

Why is it hard to say "I'm sorry"? Is it because we don't want to admit that we are only human and can make mistakes? Is it because we don't care if we hurt other people? Or is it because we don't know that person well? Is it because you don't or wont be seeing each other? Or because it is hard to swallow our pride? Or because we truly believe that we did nothing wrong?

On the other hand, there are people who do say "I'm sorry" quite easily. The question here is: Are they sincere or not? Is it because they make so many mistakes and hurt so many people that saying "I'm sorry" meant nothing anymore? I truly believe that if you care enough, you wont have to say "I'm sorry" because you will make sure you are not hurting anybody at all.

If you publicly accused someone of something, and later on found out that you were wrong, would you publicly apologize too? or would you apologize privately? If you were the accused, which would you prefer? To me, it doesn't really matter, as long as that person admits to his/her wrongdoing, sincerely, that is fine with me.

Let's talk about an incident with S. I don't "personally" know S, I just knew her face and name and we've been to the same high school and college. We got re-acquainted last year thru an egroup and I thought I found a friend (I'm so naive). One innocent question that I posted in our egroup turns into disaster! S said I don't have the right to ask that question since it doesn't concern me. She's right when she said that it doesn't concern me since I am here in Canada and the event will take place in the Philippines, but because I saw this as a trend I had to ask my question. Just because she can't provide a "logical explanation" to an "innocent question" doesn't mean that S have the right to call me an "egghead" or wanting to kick me out of the egroup! (Actually there's 3 of us here, so we are now known as the "tatlong itlog or three eggheads"). And worst, she spread it like fire... this "egghead" had reached HongKong, USA and who knows where else, before it reaches Canada! What the hell is that for??? Even those other members of our egroup whom I haven't talk to since high school would suddenly send me YM messages asking me what was wrong. If she has a problem with me, she should have confronted me. It was as if we were transported back to our high school days! Grrrrrr...

Some say she has always been like that... guess I found out a bit too late... Anyway, I confronted her, I guess she didn't know me well enough to realize that I confront people. Haha... And she was in total denial! She claim she never said those mean things about me... she only admitted on calling me an "egghead" and still she never apologize for it! Since then, I kept my distance... no sense in keeping in touch with people like S.

Sigh...

"Words can hurt you by what is said about by others. A false accusation can destroy a career, ruin a relationship, and end a marriage. Words are weapons and words used frivolously, callously or with evil intent can cause you immeasurable harm. Gossip is destructive. Backbiting is destructive. Rumor is destructive. Inaccuracy is destructive." by Dan Davies

Reading for today: The Cookies

8 comments:

bing said...

the trouble sometimes when somebody is at fault, the concerned is the last one to know.

for me, one should not ask forgiveness if it does not come from the heart. it doesnt need a public apology, just ask forgiveness.

TinTin said...

Some people never grow up. If they are like this now, avoid them like the plague!

Kevin Lam said...

Are you famous in that egroup?
I think that person just wanted to destroy your image, you'll find these kind of person everywhere. Don't let it bother you, just continue to do what you think is right.

If others privately send a message and asked you, just mannerly explain the fact to them.

JO said...

Hi Bing, thanks for dropping by my blog.

Hi Tintin, yes, I have avoided her already!

Hi Lam, let's just say that I am one of the minority of that egroup, while S is part of the elite group.

Duke said...

hi JO!

some people find happiness in the expense of others...

do keep you distance.. she's not worth it..

JO said...

hi duke, yes, i've kept my distance... and have been disregarding her emails...

MrsPartyGirl said...

i agree with duke, you dont need "friends" like that.

JO said...

Hi Meeya, oh yes!