The Birth Order of Children

Got this from my inbox. This is funny and sooooo true!!! It's a good thing I only have 2 kids... but you know what? I'm the fourth child in my family. So I was never pampered like my 3 older siblings.

I notice that during my first pregnancy, I never missed a single doctor's appointment and no matter how I hate it, I drink milk as much as I can... on my second pregnancy, I remember missing 2-3 appointments or delaying it for another week or two and I only drink milk if its chocolate milk. When my son was sick, even with fever only, I took him to the doctor immediately... but with my daughter, I monitored her for 2-3 days before taking her to the doctor.

Just thought I'd share this...


The Birth Order of Children

Your Clothes:
1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN confirms your pregnancy.
2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.
3rd baby: Your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes.

Preparing for the Birth:
1st baby: You practice your breathing religiously.
2nd baby: You don't bother because you remember that last time, breathing didn't do a thing.
3rd baby: You ask for an epidural in your eighth month.

The Layette:
1st baby: You pre-wash newborn's clothes, color-coordinate them, and fold them neatly in the baby's little bureau.
2nd baby: You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and discard only the ones with the darkest stains.
3rd baby: Boys can wear pink, can't they?

1st baby: At the first sign of distress-a whimper, a frown-you pick up the baby.
2nd baby: You pick the baby up when her wails threaten to wake your firstborn.
3rd baby: You teach your three-year-old how to rewind the mechanical swing.

1st baby: If the pacifier falls on the floor, you put it away until you can go home and wash and boil it.
2nd baby: When the pacifier falls on the floor, you squirt it off with some juice from the baby's bottle.
3rd baby: You wipe it off on your shirt and pop it back in.

1st baby: You change your baby's diapers every hour, whether they need it or not.
2nd baby: You change their diaper every two to three hours, if needed.
3rd baby: You try to change their diaper before others start to complain about the smell or you see it sagging to the ir knees.

1st baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Bab y Swing, and Baby Story Hour.
2nd baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics.
3rd baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaner.

Going Out:
1st baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter, you call home five times.
2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to leave a number where you can be reached.
3rd baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees blood.

At Home:
1st baby: You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby.
2nd baby: You spend a bit of everyday watching to be sure your older child isn't squeezing, poking, or hitting the baby.
3rd baby: You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children.

Swallowing Coins (a favorite):
1st child: When first child swallows a coin, you rush the child to the hospital and demand x-rays.
2nd child: When second child swallows a coin, you carefully watch for the coin to pass.
3rd child: When third child swallows a coin you deduct it from his allowance!

God's reward for allowing your children to live.


Raquel said...

Hahaha, kawawa naman si Patricia, sana di mabasa nya ang entry na to, baka magtampo.

Your clothes: I started wearing maternity clothes at 6 months na...grabe pag 3rd baby na, cguro tabatsoy kaya parati naka maternity dress....very funny.

Nakow, mukhang totoo talaga to Jo. Kaya mas maganda kung konte lang anak natin. No wonder ang iba mag rebelde na dahil di sila mahal.

The last part is very funny, "swallowing coins".

JO said...

Hi Raquel,
You will appreciate this more if you have more than 1 kid... you will see the difference for yourself. Hintayin mo lang...

mama jenn said...

hahaha! i'm the eldest among 4 - lagi nga nilang sinasabi "buhos" daw ako. ako naman, i have 2, and we plan to stick to that, so hindi na siguro ako aabot na babawasan ko ng allowance pag nakalulon ng coin :D

evi said...

some are so funny. does that make me lucky since i'm the eldest of two?

JO said...

Hi Jenn,
Your lucky to be the eldest... pampered to the max talaga.

Hi Evi,
Funny yet so true! Wait till you get another child and let me know...

Soulful_SensitiveStreak said...

Hi Jo. I can relate to the things you wrote about the first baby. I'm sure the other things really often take place but since I don't have a second child yet, I will have to wait and see about those things. :)

I'm the first child and my mom tells me how pampered I was more than my younger brother. My mom documented everything when I was growing up. I have tons of baby pictures compared to my younger brother. But my mom says she loved us just the same.


JO said...

Hi Rach,
As I mentioned earlier I'm the 4th of 5 2 elder brothers has tons of baby pictures, excited pa ang parents ko then... my sister came along, she has tons of pictures kasi first daughter... pagdating sa akin, tamad na sila, I just have a few baby pictures... pagdating sa sumunod sa akin, palibhasa bunso na, madami na naman siyang pictures.

Linnor said...

medyo guilty ako sa ibang counts. hehehe....

fayenget said...

last part was so funny!!! I don't mind having lots of babies hehehe. Obvious na atat magka-baby no!

Ann said...

Hahaha! Tawa ako nang tawa kase karamihan ay totoo talaga. Dagdag mo pa yung sa bawat galaw ng unang anak ay andyan ang camera at detalyado ang mga pictures. Ang daming pares ng sapatos at damit na yung iba ay hindi na naisuot dahil nakalakihan na.

Dami ko pa sanang sasabihin kaya lang wag na lang..hehehe. Siguro yung iba kaya hindi na nagawa sa mga sumunod na anak ay dahil sanay na tayo at alam na natin na hindi naman pala kailangan na mag worry or pwede naman pala kahit hindi na gawin pa.

Tani said...

so true. in my case, i don't bring my 2nd baby to the pedia for her vaccines as regularly as when it was my 1st baby. kawawa nga daughter ko eh. :) the one about maternity clothes made me really laugh out loud. :D

Bugsy said...

This is soo funny but I can't help wondering what happens to the 4th, 5th... children. I am the 3rd and 3 younger siblings.

JO said...

Hi Linnor,
Don't worry, you are still the best mom to your 3 boys!

Hi Faye,
I'm sure your time will come... in the meantine, enjoy your time with hubby.

Hi Ann,
Maganda nga gawan ng post itong title na ito... dami pa sana akong gustong i-share kaya lang super busy lang talaga ako these days.

JO said...

Hi Tani,
Same here!

Hi Bugsy,
I'm the 4th of 5 children, definitely I missed out a lot compared to my older brothers and sister... but I know that our parents love us all the same. Yan lang naman ang pinaka importante, di ba?